WOTZC-Blog

Enjoy Modulated Launderings also on Spotify

2012-04-16 20:23:00

WOTZC´s FME Awards result speculation

2012-02-19 15:18:30

Our amazing fans surprised not only the Finnish metalheads but us too!!
They voted WOTZC in very high places in the following categories:

MUSICIAN OF THE YEAR 2011:
10. Vesa Pännäri (bass, WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW)

SELF-RELEASE OF THE YEAR 2011:
4. WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW - Modulated Launderings

ALBUM ARTWORK OF THE YEAR 2011:
10. WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW - Modulated Launderings


Here´s some possible reasons and stories behind them:)

MUSICIAN OF THE YEAR 2011:
10. Vesa Pännäri (bass, WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW)

Rock on Vesa!!! Though this really isn´t a surprise for any of us Wankers it´s great to see so many people understanding Vesa´s humble virtuosity. Vesa was the only bass player in TOP10 and left some pretty respected musicians behind. I think it´s finally becoming a fashion to like cool, humble, precise players instead of mega-fast math-solo crazyness.



SELF-RELEASE OF THE YEAR 2011:
4. WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW - Modulated Launderings

Told ya:) I wanna hug everyone of you who have seen the timeless magic of Modulated Launderings.



ALBUM ARTWORK OF THE YEAR 2011:
10. WANKERS OF THE ZOO CREW - Modulated Launderings

The picture was actually taken by the very first WOTZC bassist Jukka Rinkinen. Just a little editing on a wonderful pic and there it is. I believe people loved to contrast between the cover and the stuff inside:)

Twanks every voter! Love ya!

-T-

Holy Protein Grail

2012-02-04 19:17:05

As some of you may know, I´m interested in lifting weights to build my body. I´ve gone to the gym almost 4 years now and somebody might think how come I´m not any bigger:)
Well first, getting huge is not my major goal, but second I did some classic mistakes in the beginning of this rewarding hobby.

After reading dozens of bodybuilding books and magazines, watching videos, studying the facts and "facts", testing and trying I´ve come to these following conclusions of common mistakes and delusions - so that you wouldn´t do the same mistakes and you´d gain your goals faster that I did.

Shaping your body naturally is simple with the right motivation and maneuvers.
Looking good is just as righteous motivation as staying/getting healthy. So no need to hide your shallow motives behind any excuses:)
Lift weights, eat and rest right and you´re on your way of achieving a bigger, better looking and healthier body.


Rule #1: Train right - stay basic
Right way of lifting weights have already been written in one book and a magazine.
The monthly BB magazines are basically just giving its reader variations of the very basic things - something a beginner or advanced bodybuilder don´t do s**t with. They do it because otherwise they´d be releasing the same mag all over again.
BB magazines are mainly just suppliment and equipment catalogs that are trying to picture their users well shaped and sexy to get people hooked on their products.
(For example shirtless people at gym would be an embarrasing sight! You often recognise a true pro of his longsleeved sweatshirt)
Of course it´s cool to get motivated by the pics in the mags just as long you won´t believe the illusions the great bodies in them have actually been gained by only using those special methods.

A good program is naturally recommended and here´s one highly respected option:

GOLDEN SIX by Arnold Schwarzenegger

My very first mistake was to start training with the style that fits only for some pro´s and minority of genetically privileged - or people doing things with a little help of some chemicals...
(Of course I can´t tell if you´re one of those and these methods give you results. If you´re getting the results you´re aiming ethically right, enjoy the awarding training, ya lucky bastard:)

Stay basic. No use of doing the isolation movements before you have enough material to isolate.
Train hard - if every rep feels nice you´re not training hard enough.
Learn the movements well to avoid injuries and to get the best out of excersise.


Rule #2: Eat right
Eat as little prosessed food as possible.
Well balanced daily diet includes fat, carbohydrates and protein in good share.
Prefer unsaturated fats, slow carbs like whole grain and vegetables and try to get aprx. 2g/kg of protein. (0,01 ounces/36 ounces of your body weight).
(As you know many athlets get their protein by eating meat but there´s also complitely vegan bodybuilders and some great books about this topic with tasty recipes:)

Forget low carb diets when gaining mass. And remember the muscle grows only when you´re getting more calories than consuming - and vise versa.



Rule #3: Rest right
Concentrate training when you´re at the gym.
Concentrate eating when you´re eating.
Concentrate resting while you´re not at the gym or eating.
Forget high pulsed aerobics if you wanna gain mass.
Sleep as much as possible. The muscle grows only on rest.

Training too much is fatal to your achieving. Even more fatal than training "too" little.
Think it this way; when you train you get a "hole" in your muscle. You rest one day and the "hole" is filled by healing. Rest two days and the "hole" overcompensates making a little pile over the existed "hole". The harder you train in each session the longer rest you need. By training too often the "hole" just keeps getting deeper and it´s goodbye for the essential progression.

Though you´re fully allowed to skip these simple facts ´cause I´m not a graduated Personal Trainer, I dare you to try.
Building you body is plain physics, not rocket science.
(If every gym member would realize this there would be a lot unemployed PT´s...)

Devote yourself for training strictly and patiently and search no shortcuts and you´ll get there soon:)


Enjoy the pumping!!

-T-

Aikuisten jutut

2011-10-02 11:47:00

Lapsena pidin aikuisten maailmaa jotenkin erilaisena ja vaikeasti ymmärrettävänä - miltä se helposti teknisine termeineen ja sivistyssanoineen vaikuttikin.

Mutta nyt, kun ajokortista tarkistetun syntymäaikani perusteella olen ikääntynyt ulos lapsellisuudesta, olen havahtunut masentavaan faktaan - me lähdemme hiekkalaatikosta, mutta hiekkalaatikko ei lähde meistä.
Yritämme kieltää moisen tosiseikan monimutkaistamalla ja moniulotteistamalla ulosantiamme. Ymmärsitkö?

Aikuisten nahistelut ja perusdilemmat ovat sisällöltään identtisiä. Vain tekniset termit ja sivistyssanat tekevät siitä varttuneemman suuhun sexysti sopivamman.
Leikkikentän räkäposkinen tönivä kusettaja on vain "aikustunut" työpaikan patologiseksi valehtelijaksi ja sosiopaatiksi.
Kun ennen neppisautosta irtosi rengas, nyt kaatuu Excel.
Jos lapsena syyssateinen maanantai kerhopäivänä itketti, nyt iskee akuutti depressio.
Kun ennen solahti lusikallinen punttiin, nyt manaillaan vääriä sananvalintoja asiakaskohtaamisessa.

Tuntuu siltä, että julmettu osa ikäkollegoistani edelleen erheellisesti luulee lapsuuden ongelmien olleen erilaisia, mitättömämpiä ja pinnallisempia.
Tästä virheellisestä ajatuksesta johtuen haetaan ilmaantuviin ongelmiin ratkaisuja, jotka syväluotauksessaan ja monimutkaisuudessaan käräyttäisivät Kasparovin pesseen super-tietokoneenkin.
Erinomainen esimerkki kykenemättömyydestä ongelmanratkaisun pelkistämiseen ovat it-vastaavat. Kun se pannahisen Excel ei aukea, tarkistelee it-vastaava html-koodeja, Javaa, Zorbasta ja smuigulaa. Kolmen tunnin kooditarkistusten jälkeen valkenee, että maanantaista masentunut sosiopaatti on vain unohtanut aukaista tietokoneensa.

Tämä aikuisten valitettava hinku syväluotaavaan ongelmanratkaisuun heidän "ainutlaatuisiin aikuisten probleemiinsa" pitää huolen, että talous takkuilee, ihmissuhteet rakoilevat ja uusia innovaatioita ei synny.

"Ei ole tyhmiä kysymyksiä". Maalaisjärkiallergikoille on.
Uusi työntekijä ei rohkene esittää tuoreine katselukulmineen jouhevoittavaa logistiikkaa parantavaa ajatusta, koska naurunpuuskasta toivuttuaan konkarit analysoivat idean pelkistäen palasiksi. Ei voi toimia, koska niin ei ole koskaan tehty.
Kappaleen alun lausehan on jo vaurio…varioitunut muotoon "Ei ole tyhmiä kysymyksiä - on vain tyhmiä ihmisiä."
Moinen vallitseva ajatusmaailma jos mikä, on omiaan säikäyttämään tulevaisuuden arat Da Vincit.

Parhaat yksinkertaisimmat sosiaalisen tilauksen omaavat ideat syntyvät useimmiten tyhjästä ja tarpeesta. Jos nykytekniikalla saisi etävaljastettua pitkästyneen ihmisen buuttautuneiden aivojen vinhan luovan juoksun, suurin ongelma ympäristö- ja energiantuotantoratkaisujen sijaan saattaisi liittyä työpaikan sosiopaatin ja syväluotaavan esimiehen selkäänpuukotuskilpaan asiakastapaamisen vääristä sananvalinnoista.


Kansalaiset - medbörgare.

Ratkaisu asuu teissä. Se on yksinkertainen, mutta haavoittuvainen.
Syväluotaaminen tappaa sen sekunneissa ymmärryksenpuutteeseen. Mutta älä varjele sitä piilottamalla, vaan uskosi sen ympärille luoman joustavan kuplan turvin, joka laskee sisäänsä vain kehittävät ajatusta eteenpäin vievät ideat.

Epäilemättä joku yritti teilata ja syväluodata ajatuksen pyörästäkin.
Kiitos töyssyiseen matkaamiseen kypsyneelle itseensä uskovalle innovaattorile, meiltä ei ole enää pallo hukassa. Eiku…

-T-

WOTZC Rumban Nisse M:n käsittelyssä!

2011-07-08 13:41:48

Rumban mustanaamiomaisesti kuolematon journalisti Nisse M on armeliaasti lahjoittanut palstatilaansa WOTZC:lle.

Alla Nissen mietteitä Salmelaisen MS-diagnoosin uutisoinnista ja heti perään Salmelaisen vastaus:

"Viime numerossa sätimme ankarin sanankääntein Hymyn verkkotoimitusta sen toistuvien, valheellisten Anssi Kela -uutisten johdosta, mikä kieltämättä nostatti kirjoittajansa omalletunnolle sellaisen eettisen dilemman, että onko oikein pilkata tavalla tai toisella rajoittuneita.
Mutta saako omat rajoituksensa jalostaa öljyksi markkinointikoneiston rattaisiin? Tämän kysymyksen asetti ja siihen itse vastasi muuan vielä tuntematon debytanttiorkesteri lähestyessään mediaa tiedotteella, jonka aiheena on laulajan terveydentila.
"Nousevan bändin keulahahmon vakava sairaus ei sotke yhtyeen suunnitelmia", kertoo tiedotteen otsikko. Otsikon alta paljastuu, että "nousevan bändin" nimi on Wankers of the Zoo Crew ja että kokoonpanon laulajalla Tommi Salmelaisella on diagnosoitu MS-tauti.
Epäselväksi jää tiedotteen tarkoitus - eihän sairaus edes vaikuta yhtyeen toimintaan, mikä mainitaan tiedotteessa kahdesti. Onko tarkoitus saada sanapari "nouseva bändi" verkko-Hymyn otsikoihin? Vai tiedottaa Salmelaisen terveydentilasta siitä kiinnostuneille faneille, vaikka varmemmin heidät molemmat olisi tavoittanut tekstiviestillä? Jäämme odottelemaan paljastuksia muiden Wankereiden erektiohäiriöistä ja peräpukamista."
Nisse M (RUMBA 09-10/11)


Vastaus:

"Mahtavaa!! On melkoinen kunnia päästä legendaarisen journalistin Nisse M:n letkeälle ja toivon mukaan luetullekin palstalle.
On äärimmäisen liikuttavaa ja hiukan hämmentävääkin, että kahden fanin bändi saa tiedotteellaan näinkin kunnioitettavaa huomiota.
Haluankin näin ollen lausua kiitokseni musteen ja palstan uhraamisesta Nisse M:lle sekä tietysti tiedotteen oivaltavasti kasanneelle RecTomRecordsin tiedotustiimille.

Ja pysykäähän toimittajat kompuuttereillanne - wänkkereiden genitaalialueiden tarkastelut uuden tiedotteen aikaansaamiseksi on käynnissä...

Erinomaista ja tautivapaata kesää itse kullekin!

p.s. valitettavasti verkko-Hymyn uutiskynnys oli tiedotteen tapauksen julkaisun suhteen liian korkealla.

Tommi Salmelainen

WOTZC solutions for digi-allergic music buyers

2011-06-01 19:58:43

1. The Stevie Wonder style = close your eyes, listen to Modulated Launderings and handle any CD cover you find.
You can even touch a vinyl covers if you think it´d give you more authentic feeling

2. Use the saved 5-8€´s for buying an interesting magazine.
We bet even Donald Duck has better words with deeper meanings than in possible Modulated Launderings leaflet. And sexier characters

3. Stop fighting against the progress.
We bet the digi-allergics were at first against Facebook also ´cause "they rather meet people in real life".

4. You can buy digital music whenever you want.
You´re able to purchase new music even on national holidays!

-T-

Fun WOTZC facts!

2011-02-19 13:54:53

Did you know that:

Tommi Salmelainen (vox)

- has written a theme song to a famous racehorse
- has given his voice to a space hippie Glar in the Finnish dubbed version of the animation Planet 51
- has refused the chance of playing icehockey with Bad Religion
- has refused the chance to jam with Stone Temple Pilots
- suffers from MS-disease and possible OCD
- has played in the same hockey team with Antti-Jussi Niemi and Jarkko Ruutu
- has once asked from a well-known Finnish musician Pauli Hanhiniemi; "How ya doing, Pate Mustajärvi?"
- has spent an evening with a Playboy girl America Olivo and photographed her with Erin Cummings´(Detroit 1-8-7, Mad Men) camera.
- took some singing lessons from Erkki "Seura, siinä se on" Liikanen
- a part of his daily job is to write movie synopsis to some theatrical and DVD releases
- has been quoted for example in a university schoolbook and NYT-liite.
- one of his very first memories is when he left his willy between the pincers

Cover songs

2010-11-20 15:33:08

WOTZC have already covered the super song from ´93 by FNM and Boo-Yaa Tribe.
The song´s called Another Body Murdered and you´ll find it on our player. The credible rap parts were spit by PALEFACE who is doing pretty darn well with his brand new album Helsinki - Shangri-La.

It´s always a risk to use outsiders to record a cover ´cause it makes it double as hard to organize things to play it live.

Cover song is a perfect way to distract new audience to like you, and in our situation when both of our fans have already heard every WOTZC song, it´s necessary to expand the repertoire.

So please let us know if you´ve find some cool and underestimated classics that need to be honoured by having a worse version to be compared to.

So please just "Comment this writing" and suggest us the next song that WOTZC should make a cover of:)

Like some smart Finnish once said: "Koveria ei jätetä"

-T-

Where do you meet new bands?

2010-11-06 19:38:48

It took us over four years to get our own official WOTZC website. Thanks to Roadkill Graphics´ Peter Limón who made it possible:)

But in my opinion, mainly because of the MySpace, it wasn´t too important to have your own pages.
But times have changed, and all the possible new listeners have left the MySpace and are now in the social networks like Facebook and Twitter.
Neither of those offers a decent way to promote your band - and I think it´s good. You should have the possibility to avoid promotional spamming there.
Spotify and Grooveshark offers you tons of new music, but they´re not too good forums to promote your band either.

So at this point, when we´re waiting for maybe some new forums or integration, I think it´s again smart to have your own site.

What do you think? Where do you meet new bands? Or have the oversupply of bands made the whole internet sooooo passé?

But here we are anyway:) Enjoy!

-T-

New tattoo

2010-09-10 21:25:06

Actually this pretty boring cliché topic is mainly just to test this blog feature, so here I go:

I´ve started getting a new tattoo and it´s going to cover pretty much my whole back.

In a 6 hour intensive and mega-painful session we got all the lines done.
I though my torso is mainly numb but no - the worst pain I´ve ever experienced. And six hours of it.
But I loved it!:)

Next we´ll do some shadings and hopefully in the end of this year the leather canvas is ready to be revealed...

The pic is a huge cliche but so am I.

Th ink that.

I´ll show you my behind when the work is done.

-T-